February 2012
30 posts
41253) I love winter. Big jackets and sweaters and...
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That happiness goal seems so far away at this point. But it’s what I want to achieve even more than my actual dream weight. Le sigh.
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I’m sick of ruining every good thing I have going for me
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I really really hate my body you guys. Like you don’t even understand. I don’t deserve any of this. And I’m sick of it. Why aren’t I dead.
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Really though.. why you. You’re perfect. Not really, but it all seems that way to me. Your personality, your face, your smile, your fucking body, your ability to laugh at everything and inability to ever be in a bad mood. Your hair, lips, eyes. I’ve never craved anyone so much in my life. I only wish I could be beautiful and perfect enough to feel worthy of you ever wanting someone,...
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Right now, I’m completely out of cigarettes and have no access to anymore for a while. And I’m thinking of you meaning right now is obviously when I need them the most.
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Sorry I’ve abandoned you all lately. I promise I’m not gone for good. Just been having a lot of problems with relapse and trying not to look at stuff that will trigger me
January 2012
57 posts
Anyone know any efficient ways of making cellulite go down? I’m getting sick of it.
?
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Jddgdd been neglecting this blog lately to avoid being triggered. Havent purged in almost a week now. Hi
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Fat disgusting and miserable
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Mirror: You're fat.
Scale: You're fat.
Clothes: You're fat.
The voices: You're fat.
Me: I know.
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1494) Never talking about food or yourself in...
Just seen a weight loss blog person I’ve followed for forever in Seventeen magazine today for her story. So weird. Omg
38890) I will never be enough.